my current one is shit in the week but sundays i can come in fucked in my pajamas and watch stuff on the internet while drinking all day, so its not too bad!

over the summer holidays. I'd show up at a school to relieve the real janny, go around the rooms, find all the best pillows / bean bags, and set up a little nest somewhere. Then get a wee hifi/tape player set up (this was a while back mind!). Then for the next two weeks I'd show up at 8am (the hardest part), have a snooze, get up and go to the bakers for some breakfast, come back, have a snooze.

Maybe have a wee smoke in the garden, climb on the roof if it was nice. Read a book or a magazine, snooze some more. In some schools there were small basketball courts for children that I could totally do mad NBA jam style slam dunks in too.

One janny left me a list of jobs to get on with. They were all things like 'clean chewing gum off roof in girls toilets' and such. I ignored them and had a snooze instead.

Makes my current job seem superbusy!

Managing a pub: brilliant, until you get fed up of dealing with the general public.
Cheffing: good until you realise you want a life on some weekends
Where I was before: good but didn't get paid enough
Where I am now: probably the best of the bunch so far. But I've only been here 6 weeks, so there's still time for it to go tits up.

was pretty good. just admin, but when you can listen to whatever music you want to listen to and you have a good team working with you anything is alright really.

as it takes me 10 minutes to walk home, which is the best thing ever.

was quite fun.

Basically driving somewhere, pretending to count whatever stock they had, and leaving. I got paid by the day, £70 i think it was, be it a one or twelve hour day. It was rarely a twelve-hour day, infact regularly it was less than two hours. The three guys i worked with were all around my age, all lazy bastards who liked a beer, so we needed no excuse to finish early. Sometimes we'd be stocktaking for really dodgy people, obviously on the take, so they'd basically sort us all a few quid to go and sit in the pub, tell us what stock figure they needed, we'd go and drink until dinner and then go back with their report. I only remember working past 3pm two or three times, and we got sent to a different city every day, sometimes down south, Scotland, Wales, Ireland, it was pretty rad. We used to do two jobs a day once a week meaning we always had Friday off, and because there was quite a lot of travelling involved, but four of us, you could really get mullered all week and sleep it off in the car on the way, unless it was your day driving. I really enjoyed it, we never knew where we'd be working, sometimes even getting phonecalls in the early morning telling us to jump in a taxi to the airport and on a plane to wherever. Plus there was the time-and-a-half for Saturdays & double-time for Sundays. We'd always make sure we had a reason for making it Sunday. Getting paid £140 for sleeping in the back of a car for three hours, then working for one, then having another three hours kip was pretty great.

was not renewed.

SPEWING, MOI? Entirely.